Christmas isn’t Christmas unless you have butter cookies. Although most people don’t take butter cookies if you ask them if they would like some, the minute you pop those bad boys open, everyone and their mother wants one. The problem is, they never stop at one. Everyone eats at least three. Thats basically a whole cup.

If four people eat a whole cup then thats almost half my cookies gone! What’s worse, no-one is ever courteous and considerate when eating my cookies. They always take the ones with sugar on top. Then the half of my cookies left aren’t even my favorite ones. I’m left with the ones I was avoiding cause you ate half my cookies.

Avoiding this is simple. Never open your butter cookies around people and try not to leave them unguarded. However, sometimes you have to leave them alone. Unfortunately, my mom told me I’m not allowed to hide them from the vultures circling, trying to steal a cup. The next best way to keep your cookies safe is to lie. Label them ‘Sewing Stuff’. No-one will ever touch them. Most people are still scarred from some time in their youth, when they went by their relatives’ houses looking for cookies and only got a heart-full of disappointment. Play on their fears. Use their PTSD to protect your cookies.

You are welcome.